The Art of Balancing Dreams and Reality

Hello, folks!

I know I don’t write on this blog as often as I’d like, but here I am, keeping the ball rolling when I can, where I can. This year has flown by, and truthfully, I’m feeling the weight of getting older—celebrations don’t come as easily as they used to.

I often think about all the things I’m passionate about and wish I had time to fully cultivate every one of them. But life, with its finite hours in a day and its unrelenting bills, has other ideas. I can’t complain, though—my art has provided me with opportunities to sustain myself, even if that means compromising on what I want to create versus what I need to create to keep the boat afloat.

Still, I recognize how privileged I am to even have the chance to navigate this journey.

So, what can I say about this year? It’s been nothing short of magical.

• I painted at three psychedelic festivals.
• I won a grant with a renowned charity, enabling a year-long art residency with my collective, where we’ve been creating opportunities for other artists.
• I curated an exhibition I’m truly proud of.
• I started teaching at a university as a career advisor for the creative industries and giving talks about sustaining an art business at colleges and universities in London.
• I completed three community mural projects, capping the year with collaborations with the NHS and Deloitte.

Writing this all down makes me realize how much I’ve accomplished—something I rarely take time to do. I’m so focused on “what’s next” that I often forget to savor what I’ve already achieved. This blog post is my way of pausing and giving myself permission to reflect.

But it hasn’t been a perfect year. My partner and I faced challenges that tested us deeply, making us more aware and less naive about the people we surround ourselves with. I’m someone who gives everything for others, and this year reminded me how essential boundaries are and how much vigilance matters.

Professionally, I’ve grown immensely, especially in areas like business skills, but let me tell you—learning to navigate the world of sales and self-promotion is no small feat when it doesn’t come naturally. It’s a steep challenge, but I focus on infusing my work with honesty and value.

So, what’s my promise to myself for the year ahead?

Keep producing my own artwork.

While creating for clients is fulfilling, my personal work is what truly makes me shine. It’s what feeds my soul and lets me express who I really am.

And here’s another reminder I’ll carry with me: stop comparing. Social media can feel like a black hole, showing me younger artists who seem miles ahead. But their lives are not my life, and my struggles are not theirs. Comparing is futile.

The only thing I can control is myself—my discipline, my output, and my belief in my own potential. Beyond that, I’ve learned to let go. I’ve done my best with the resources I had, and that’s enough.

Do I need to be the best of the best? No, and frankly, I don’t want to be. I’m proud of where I am, especially considering where I started—a non-native English speaker carving a space for myself as a woman in street art, in a foreign country. It hasn’t been easy, and there have been disadvantages along the way, but feeling sorry for myself won’t change anything.

What will? The right mindset, discipline, and the resolve to keep going.

Here’s a truth I’ve come to accept: while society tells us we can achieve anything if we work hard enough, reality is more complex. We can control what’s within us, but not what’s out there. And that’s okay. It’s not failure to let go of the illusion of control—it’s freedom.

As I close this chapter and step into 2025, I hope you can embrace the same peace. Life is too short to carry the weight of things we can’t change.

Wishing you a bright, hopeful start to the new year.

With love and truth,
Lespleen